My sister-in-law was around...just talked and we laughed...she notices I've lost more weight...hardly surprising really considering the way I am, the way I feel.
She likes my skirt...well I've had it two years and it actually fits properly now and is not bursting off my hips...
Beginning to like my new shape just wish it did not have to come with all the baggage.
My nails are completely knackered...need to go to the salon soon...need to feel more feminine, more perfect than I am right now.
She was shocked though...shocked I would rather go for the pill approach to my problem as opposed to the stand up and have an almighty row approach...
That will come, have no fear..the small building blocks are there and I know it will become a sturdy and strong wall..not only one of defence but one from which I will launch my attack...how dare he, how dare he, how dare he...
...and her...the bitch..the complete and utter bitch. The anger is more solid now...not as fluid.
Spending this day with my son...with me instead of childminder...helps me to stay busy instead of slinking under the duvet and sleeping the day away.
Well...off we go...
Out to the big fun soft play place....
Remember Darcy once saying to me he was at the soft play place with his boys...'just taking shoes off before throwing myself in,' and 'soft play...I like our hard play too...'
G is off somewhere this weekend...he thinks I somehow will overnight turn into a devoted wife and believes he is stopping that process...clearly that is not the case...never has been....I need that diversion, I need that release, I need that outlet otherwise I shall go mad...is that an echo of Macbeth or Lear? Maybe both...past caring.
Soft play it is then...
