Today...well I feel like the letters in the blue bar above this text space!
F U K D

The show begins with mother mode...kids up, dressed, fed...school run...husband leaves at 5 30 am and with sleeping tabs I am oblivious.

Return home alone...mixed feelings...other mothers at the school gate...know I normaly am at work...well..fuck off...

Beautiful boy...clinging onto my leg...knows I am not going to work...but happily trundles off eventually inside childminders house.

I feel guilty...he should be with me...but must keep him in routine and it will be so hard when I do go back...so must stay normal...normal.

Do the washing.
Do the tidying.
Huge urge to peruse the web...I resist...
I need sleep....
Strip off to undies...climb in...duvet protects me...
MMmmm...brought toys to bed..just in case...

Receive text...From the one who liked my bottom over a year ago...can I call you at 12?...

I nod off...feel cold, can't get warm.

Waking up to the phone...he texts agin..something naughty and suggestive...I ponder...yes really I DO...never spoken to him...well not this year so far!...very little memory of him..in fact ..let's be blunt here..none...nothing!

But...I want to play...the sexy texts turn me on...let's face it...this is the ultimate in safe sex!

He wants to listen...he wants to talk...dirty...well...yep, okay then...your phone bill mate!

So he calls...I answer...squirming in my bed...no theatricals required...

A pleasant and mature voice....53...is that too old? But he was experienced...very and knew exactly what he wanted as well as what I rather fancied...you see he has een me...I sent some photos last year and cannot remember sending them. Perhaps I was drunk or just despairing. I don't know.

Hard and penetrative orgasm...then another...short time later...I must admit, I did wonder if he was in pain when I listened to his! But he was okay...He wants to meet...

Check out my messages...oh dear...too deep, too raw, too vulnerable....got that rectified...hopefully to fun, exciting and my dreams can live for so long...no pressure at all..

Showerd...binned wet knickers...cleaned toys...hid them...

No lunch...
Collect the children...home...homework, arguing, tea.

Could not eat tea...screen now swimming...tablet pulling everything back,,,inwards,,

My womb has rocked so much today...my period has begun...which increases my sex drive even more!!!!

And so..the variety show ends with a solitary view of tv and a slinking into bed next to unshwered husband....shit...keys are swimming...must go