Posts archive for: 12 July, 2008
  • Reflecting Upon Indecent Proposal etc...

    Indecent Proposal has a lovely voice and is certainly an intelligent, articulate man. Married (aren't they all!)...children and a wife who...no longer discusses sex apparantly, never mind has it. He has had lovers before and is seeking one now. Professional male..again works for himself, again has his own successful firm, again has the same vocation as Darcy and even worked for the same employers as Darcy in the early days...appears that old firm of Price and Water and House and Cooper (in no particular order), teaches people their trade quite well...before they move on.

    No more hairslide scenarios ever.
    Discretion assured and fantasies played.
    He's an interesting combination of The Director, Darcy and even FF actually! We've only spoken the once..it lasted for nearly two hours though...and I'm relaxed and not yearning for him. That is a good sign as I know I can control my feelings and not become too close.I am using my compartment method well and my beautiful feelings for those I hold dear are still carefully hidden away, wrapped in soft tissue paper...waiting patiently.

    Our conversation flowed very well indeed. Natural and effortless with nothing particularly rude. Everything rather philosophical and fun.

    France is flying away to A_____ for a couple of weeks and wants to keep in touch. He sounds really sweet, but he may become too close I suspect.

    The Director is ensuring his house is in order and he must have been incredibly burnt in the past when he was discovered by a former spouse. He's very, very naughty actually and I believe has a compulsion for adultery no matter how high the stakes. However, I do understand completely when he says one would/could never do to one's spouse what one could/would do with a lover. IP has the same type of pattern...as does FF..as did Darcy. Probably Mansion Man too...who is going to some exotic, private island soon and has no concept of just how lucky he is!!! He's always working though. He works and works and enjoys what he has earned.

    But for me, time to relax and reflect as I know the date is set and now I prepare and wait...and if The Director resurfaces when his facade is once more pure, then I'll deal with that as and when.

    I approach the Building Of Betrayal with new vigour and thrive on the fact that Bitch has not succeeded with her game plan. A short time now until my well-deserved time away from the nest of vipers.

    Long may I reign.

  • Long Walk Home

    Planes fell out of the sky again in my dream last night...it was balanced on a tall island and then fell deeply into the ocean, breaking in half...Flames as it fell. Young One was on it...cycling journeys and trying to survive melted into an exhausting dream.

    Many more exhausting events at The Building Of Betrayal. She wants and wants and wants. She thrives on angst and hates it when people are harmonious. When Bitch goes I will drink champagne..on site....and I will rejoice. That day will come. Never ever complain from the top down..it's always upwards...complain and gripe up the chain of command...
    Bitch has much to learn.
    Red eyes from a meeting.
    Aggression in her tone.
    I will never deliver or feel compassion for her.

    Professional , yes.
    Weeping and in need of friendship and understanding...no.

    Tonight, Indecent Proposal talked as he wandered through country lanes and onto village cricket pitches.
    He wants me and is ensnared by my independence, confrontation and questionning.
    It's rather turned him on!

    I know we will meet and I feel excited about the prospect, less than a fortnight away. The Director laments and is being careful. I will stay out of the way, yet I suspect we will meet again.

    I miss the one who flirts and plays; who is across the Pennines and still I wonder if the entwining of white sheets will ever feel so comforting again...I miss that, the warmth of the sunlight and the inner yearning of what must not be.

    I miss him more than he knows.

    I miss him.

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