Prettyintelligentprincess

That is how I feel.
It's rather weird.

Struggling to sleep properly as utterly stressed when I wake at 4am (like I did this morning). I thrashed around a while and cringed as I fought against the awful noises from a snoring hub. Eventually, I actually masturbated as he slept next to me...it felt such a great release and I was finally beginning to sleep when his alarm went off!

But now...I cannot be bothered to even blog properly!

However, a little update:
I have no inclination for sex with strangers...still. I am avoiding opening my mailbox.
I have no inclination to meet G-inc.
I have no inclination to engage in banter with sexually deprived hopefuls on the trashy site...

I still have no credit card!
I still fancy some intelligent frolicking with Jones but he and I are both busy yet that is okay and we are balanced with our banter several hundred miles apart!
I still struggle to feel balanced and calm with Bitch (Bluff)...
I wish her to move on and it will happen...but not yet.
Cycleman may move on too...soon...and I am glad.
Willow is doing so well.
Angel is a steady influence.

Today: I watched some of Michael Moore's 'Farenheit 911' in The Building.

Jaw droppingly clever!

I may liven up soon from the languidity that envelops me...

Busy with family things...
Declined my usual night out last night and remained at home with red wine and Elizabeth.
Slept from half six, Friday tea time until 8, Saturday morning: so tired and absolutely dreading this coming week...

Bluff fucked up and she is trying to pass it onto me; I have already alerted Deputy Chief who is the solidity and pragmatist I admire.

Weirdly, I was answering my phone to Mr Secret, completely starkers today...a rare sun bed visit and he rang...well, his finger slipped apparently...Told him I would never complain!
The friendship and quips are healthy and sensible, without awkwardness. Just right.

There may be someone I may meet...

An intelligent and eloquent someone. Let's call him Jones...

If Julie Walters does not get a BAFTA for this I will be amazed.
Beautiful.
Deep.
Harsh.
Emotional.
Frank.
Deeply disturbing and brave.

I'm going to dissolve now and I hoped to avoid that by writing here...

Never do I stop tears from falling...I'm far too emotional.

0630: Get up, showered, dressed.(Alone as hub has already left for his place of work).
0643: Make a coffee.
0645: Get children up,washed, dressed, breakfasted,
become peacemaker.
0700: Blow dry my hair,drink coffee, clean teeth,apply lipstick and a slight brush of foundation if pale and tired looking.
0715: Ask children to clean their teeth.
0717: Put schoolbags, school shoes, school coats in the hallway.
0720: Ask children to clean teeth. (in a louder voice).
0722: Load up the car with my bags, laptop, children's bags.Make beds, open curtains, load dishwasher,load washing machine, wipe surfaces.
0730: Stop the fight and scream at the children to clean their bloody God damned teeth as they will get holes in them, they will drop out and cause great pain which will mean they have to go to hospital.
(Loud stampede to the bathroom, tap on, sound of brushing...)
0735: Tie back her hair, gel his hair, wipe faces, put coats on, bring milk in, ensure the cat is not locked in the bedrooms.
0740: Help children into the car, lock up, get into driving seat.
0745: Arrive ( if light traffic) at pre school care...it opens at this time. Remove children, bags from car. Return to car.
0755: Arrive at The Building.
0800: Meeting called by Bluff.
0830: Meeting ends.
0835: Whole Building briefing.
0845: Begin my day with The Plurals...
1500: Plurals go home.
1501: Meeting called by Bluff for one hour.
1600: Leave The Building to collect the children from after school care...
1620: Arrive home, homework, reading, writing, words, letters in schoolbags, invitations in school bags need answering. (The calendar is full...)
1700: Begin to prepare evening meal.
1730: Evening meal cooked, hub arrives home, tired from work, sit at table as a family.
1800: Run a bath for the children, add bubbles and toys.
1830: Dry children, read story, put out school clothes for the next day.
1900: Lights out.
Then begins my work again; preparation and planning for the following day.

I am exhausted.
No time for children.
No time for a husband.
No time for me.
Yet...I need to make time for a lover which is paradoxically a solution for my sanity.

Bed for me now.
Night night...xx

...P. S. and Edinburgh...(Ref G-inc) is just not accessible right now....
I need a direct rail link ...or motorway link!

Mansion Man as all 'a-texting'...'I'm losing millions darling...'

G says he loves me but actually really needs a sexy fuck.

I need a sexy fuck please with intelligent company and I am desperate for the credit card to arrive!

I am a restless girl.

Watch this space.

Last night, as my husband showered, I masturbated on the bed; we had been talking a few moments earlier, just after putting the children to bed.

He locked the bathroom door; I turned onto my tummy and then my back; skirt raised and stockings still grasping the thighs...

It was powerful and wonderful and rather wet.

Afterwards I was lying relaxed, arms above my head looking at the ceiling as I waited for my heart to catch up with my breathing....or was it the other way around?

Later, I showered too and we went out out for drinks...

My own pleasure is the greatest I know and own at this lonely moment in time.

12 beautiful hours of sleep last night...7 to 7.

I never meant to go to bed, for the night, I always reassure myself and everyone else around me I am going for a short lie down as I have a weird psychological barrier about going to bed to sleep...(See early posts if you like)

Oh, I still can't find that credit card and I may request a replacement today!

Sipping Red..a gift from The Chief...good results...and his reward to all in the team ...

Yet I am dissatisfied.

I want the invisible.
I want the dream.
I want the unattainable...and the Building is still oppressive and steeped in heady attainment.

Let's just move away from there now and just rest with me...home and children and day to day musings and choosings.

I find myself still wanting the invisible...

The fact of the matter is , I cannot find my credit card to sign up for sexy fun with sexy men!!! I hid it to prevent temptation and I can't bloody find it! Don't get me wrong; I still receive a steady stream of 'contenders' from the trash sites that have my details, however, dare I say, trash creates trash....I would rather have some high calibre company and I need a high calibre bedfellow...and I suspect my serious and thorough search has just started.

Unless...

We have some high calibre readers closer to home....

Tonight, the weather is bloody awful. Gales and rain. I need some warmth.
All I can hear is the wind whooping around the walls outside.

Today, I bought the latest James Morrison and the music from Bridget Jones 2!
Also, 'Elizabeth,The Golden Age' as I've still not seen it and Tesco had a bit of a sale going on.
Finally, a new vacuum cleaner! I actually blew the hoover up yesterday. Don't ask.
But I've a groovy red one now, even gone bagless!

You ever been bagless? It's quite liberating!
PS. I've become a Daily Mail consumer just for the Costume Drama DVD giveaway duration!

Sumptuous and light and pastorally very beautiful.

I love it!

Beautiful dresses.
A dashing gentleman amidst the proper ladies.

And...the sun is shining.

(Can't have been filmed last Summer In England then!)

I need to downsize...I do...I just want to feel comfortable in my suit for work! (And my bras...some are just too tight!)
So, I'm looking for a dance class...and the local gym may be able to provide something funky and fun as I HATE depriving myself of anything I enjoy..and I enjoy the feel and movement of dance very much.
I must pop under the sunbed too...just to avoid any sadness...been there once since July.
I'm also doing lots of pelvic floor exercises!!! It's actually because someone I know who is younger than me is having surgery for 'a slight prolapse'...oh God..I squeeze and squeeze and squeeze! It's getting easier.
My eczema on my hand has flared up slightly too...just getting that under control.
Work at The Building is busy and exhausting...and I am playing the game until the Bluff finally goes. I hope so much she does soon. Willow is back and is happy; Dylan has been head-hunted and I know he will go soon; he has been the victim of The Bluff's latest vitriolic tirade and he will move on, taking his brilliance with him.
I stay and will continue to do so.

I always said I would.
In fact, it's soon the anniversary of The Return...

This morning...and yesterday too, I shared my passion and loud orgasm with my pillow.
Alone in the marital bed, I shed the sensible pyjamas and pushed hard against the raised bedding...stifling my cries and moans so...not to wake the children.
I felt the hard heartbeat against the duvet and rested...blissful and relaxed...
Finally, slinking out of bed and enjoying the warmth of my own warmness seeping down my thigh as I hurry to get dressed.

I have rarely had a a multiple orgasm with a man... Darcy and FF...spring to mind...yet alone I ebb and ebb and ebb....

Jack 'the lad' is texting me right at this very moment...he is furtive and yet eager and I just may end up giving in.
How strange...he's just used the word 'astride'..not exactly mega imagination but I'll give him a few pointers...shall I?

MMmmm...a few pointers sent...perhaps I will have scared him....

He's definitely a boob man...
Now that's appealing. I do adore men who adore boobs!

I have some sexy work to do.
Catch you later....

G-Inc has been texting all the way from his weekly Edinburgh commute...
'How are you? How are your two lovely babies? How are things at work? Are you still sexy? Are you still a Princess? Are you still my friend? xxxx'
'Do you still love me?'

Clearly a little too much cocaine this evening...very forward and very chatty!
But lovely and a long way away from me ...so little chance of me stepping onto dangerous ground.

Oh I yearn for some close sexy play...and I need to be more proactive.

Where has that credit card gone?
That site is back in my mind!

Jack is still hoping for a meet next week...I've lost interest actually...he's too grateful.
Do you know what I mean?
Too grateful?
I need some passionate and sexy, dare I say, macho attention; intelligent sex. Intelligence and cleanliness and passion.

The Director is on his last chance!

Just when I'd finally forgotten all about him he showed up...electronically of course...The Director.
'So sorry I've deserted you...' Then asked directly about that rather intimate part of my anatomy he enjoys being extremely intimate with.
The game's afoot I believe...and I cannot wait.